Done it.

 

I made it out yesterday, and I actually walked around B&Q and the Range, we had a good shop and bought several plants for the new raised beds, also bought some paint to decorate the new study now that we have had the French windows put in, so all in all a good day. I was a little stressed out the day before, thinking of going out but as I new the shops it was not to bad. The only thing now is I can hardly move all my joints are hurting, guess it’s the most exercise I’ve done for a long time. Caz has put the plants into the bed, I managed to plant two, and put in some seeds, it all looks great I’m very pleased with what we achieved, thanks to Caz.I have also started a new batch of sourdough bread starter, I’m going to get back to making all our own bread again, it’s much nicer, but I also don’t want to be eating so much bread and so it is part of my plan for changing our lifestyle, by eating less processed foods and making it as fresh as you can, so we shall see how that progresses on.

It’s great now that we have the French windows in, it brings the house and garden much more together, and that’s important to me, being able to just step out into the garden, or sit with the doors open but still feel part of the garden, it’s lovely. We have a deep red rose in the garden, it’s one we brought with us when we moved here I guess it must be over 20 years old, we know it as our Aunty Babs rose as it was bought for us by my much loved and very much now missed aunty Babs. The scent from the rose just fills the garden and will now hopefully also fill the house, it flowers all summer long and is the heart of our garden, a very treasured plant.

I also love photography and would love to be able to get out more and to do more of it, when we first moved here I was able to get about more and took some beautiful shots of this amazing island. I have just sold my Dslr camera because I was not using it, but also because I find it difficult to cope with the weight and all the lenses that go with it, so I bought both myself and Caz a Canon Powershot G5x camera, it’s a lovely little camera and easy to transport, and has wifi which is great for blogging, I still have my older Nikon D7000 and some lenses it’s a great camera too but not so portable for me, walking with a stick and sometimes crutches makes carrying a Dslr difficult. Well I’ll have to post some of my photography soon for you to see hopefully you’ll like them. I feeling less stressed at the moment as we have now decided not to take another trip away this coming weekend, though inside I know we will be soon, but it takes the pressure off for now, I really want to be able to just get up and go away at a drop of the hat, but it’s so difficult and stressful I sometimes wonder is it all worth it. Hope you all have a great day and achieve all you want to……

The Plants that we bought.
Planted up.
From the other side
Aunty Babs Rose

Gooseberries & mind games.

 

Well we picked 3lb of gooseberries yesterday, not a huge amount but enough to make some jam, it’s a job to time picking any fruit in our garden, as I have said before it’s very much a cottage/wildlife garden, and the wildlife seem to get their fair share of the bounty, but that’s the way it should be we all have to live, and at this time of year the are all trying to feed their young, and it’s lovely to be able to see all thous young fledglings in the garden. So my first job today after posting this blog is jam making, and I shall post a photo of the finished produce, have our scones ready lol.

I have been starting to feel stressed today, and I know the feeling will grow completely out of control as the week goes on, I felt at ease when we returned from our long weekend break last weekend, testing out our new eriba caravan we really love it, it’s very retro and comfortable, and having achieve our first get away I was now ok that we were back home, I could relax again and enjoy looking at the photos from the weekend, really like looking at the for the first time as if I had not been there and I was looking at someone else’s adventure, I was now safe at home. Then today the subject arose about going on another trip, and right away I can feel the tension inside, I want to curl up into a ball and hide away, I could shake myself, tell myself how daft I am “I’m 62 in a couple of weeks” why do I have to be like this, why can’t I just be like others? I will try and fill my thoughts with other stuff, but it will just be there all the time, tapping me on the shoulder when I let my guard down, I want to tackle this but honestly I don’t know if I can! I have great support from my family but it’s so difficult to open up and put things into words, especially when your supposed to be the head of your family. It breaks my heart when my we get to the shops and my wife or daughter ask if I am coming into the shops, and I say no, then the little voice of my 4 year old granddaughter says “come on grandad, please!” The mind is so very complicated, but a day a a time that’s all I can do.

On a lighter note I’ll share a story of when I was an apprentice chef, training under my father. It was a very busy kitchen in a seaside three star hotel, I was about 16 at the time and most of us were smokers then, so every now and then we would say “just off to the toilet chef” and my father who was the head chef would say don’t be to long, knowing that we were really just going for a cigarette. My father had a funny side to him and loved a joke, we had all been caught by him, he would wait for us to enter the outside toilet that was in the passage leading to the garage, the toilet had a gape above and under the door, and as soon as he saw a puff of smoke come over the top he would throw a full bucket of ice cold water over the top, you can imagine the shock lol.

So one day we all planed our revenge, and it was not long before we had our chance, my father headed off to the toilet, and we all filled our buckets and marched outside, the light went on so we all let loose our buckets of ice cold water…… the screams and shouts from within were not that of my father, oh no! What had we done? We all ran back into the kitchen where we each kept our heads down and got on with our work, but each one of us kept an eye on the door to see who would come in. To our horror the door opened and a raging head porter in his top hat and tails came in drenched demanding to know who had done this to him, no one uttered a word, there were some muffled sniggers, but when he left to get change my father returned, he could hardly stand up, and there were tears of laughter coming down his face – yes he had set us up really good, he had suspected what we were up to, no one but him had notice the head porter head for the toilets we were to busy watching my dad, he then followed the head porter but instead of going to the toilets had run into the garage where he watched the whole thing unfold, it’s laughable now but we were bricking it at the time.

Just thought that may lighten your day, I post pics of the gooseberry jam later..

Gooseberries

Our Garden

 

The garden! I love our garden, I don’t do much in the garden Caz is the gardener and she is very good at tending it. The style of are garden is that of a cottage/wildlife garden, and when talking about my anxiety, phobia, lymphoedema or any other of my ailments it is the garden that will ease all thous issues, the garden is a very healing place, there is nothing better than sitting in the garden breathing in the fresh air, with all the nature around you, then closing your eyes and becoming aware of all the sounds of the garden, it is at this point you can drift into a wonderful meditation, breathing in all that energy in the garden and allowing that energy to fill your body and heal, it calms and energies you.Yes the garden is a wonderful place, and over the last few days we have had the window fitters in and we now have French window out of the back of the house allowing more access to the garden and making the garden and the house one, it’s wonderful.

Now I said Caz does the gardening and I said she is good, well a few years ago we entered the wildlife garden competition and the first year we came third, Bronze, the second year we came second, silver, then we missed a year and when we entered the following year, well we got first, yes GOLD, plus best in class, it was amazing and Caz deserved it for all her hard work. And whilst we are on the subject of Caz, not only is she an amazing gardener, but she is an amazing carer, and is always there when I need her, and no one understands me as she does, she is my sole mate, and I can’t thank her enough.

Our Tilly loves the garden too, she loves rooting around and she loves it when the grandchildren come, being a Lancashire Heeler she just loves herding them up, they all have so much energy and a day in the garden sees them all sleep well at night. Our granddaughter just loves picking strawberries, raspberries – peas and just about any fruit or vegetable and eating it there and then in the garden, you can’t have your food any healthier than that.

I love watching all the different birds that visit the garden, and was so please last year when I took photos of newly fledged Gold Crests absolutely beautiful, then we have all the butterflies and a few years ago the humming bird hawk moth, incredible to watch. We have newts, frogs, toads, hedgehogs, rabbits the list goes on, all these things lift your heart, and gives life a true meaning, I would be happy to spend all the rest of my days just in our garden, if only I could!

So yes the garden is probably the most important part of our house, If you are religious, and I believe I am then it is your church and if God is anywhere then he will definitely be there.

Well that is a little extract about our garden, and from time to time I’ll post some photos of how things are going, if you have a garden then why not go into it today and have a meditate and enjoy the peace.

The new French windows

Entering the garden